i watched being human today, wow that really was a big big slap on the face.here i wanna write what i want to say to him and how i feel :
- - - - - i want you to be here not just in my dreams, cuz everyday im suffocating and i can't breathe cuz how much tears and cries i cried for you somehow i know you won't be here, never.i..im in so much pain i can/t breathe properly and i know its stupid but wht the hell am i supposed to do?! i cried every night cuz nothing seems to bring light to my life, i want to live my life but it feels so empty.sometimes i just think that wouldn't it be better if i'd just be the undead.live to kill but i have feelings and how much its hurting me im still waiting for you.so if there is 0.0000001% that kiyuu is not just a fiction, god please bring him to me cuz i can't breathe no more. my heart feels like its stuffed with needles and so much pain is in me im bursting with depression.so if you're out there kiyuu nakahara, please just rescue me.please. in any way i'll accept it with open arms, i'll give anything so just could you take me away.somewhere far enough so that i'll be able to at least have a taste of happiness and joy.everytime i watched those damned vampire and wolves movies, drama series or i read a book bout those creatures, im reminded of you and the pain goes up to my spine cuz wht im seing is something that i longed for but will never happen.but i love it, those kinds of stories just filled my imagination bout you so the pain is something like a payment.but how long can i pay??until my deaths.....im wasting my life n time trying to wait 4 something that im pretty sure ain't gonna happen but i still do.i will do.i will wait for you, kiyuu.
